At Latitude News, we report both the serious and the ridiculous. While we put a stronger focus on the former, we find a place for the latter each week in our Mishmash — a collection of the weirdest, stupidest, funniest, most offensive stories we can find from the global press. To celebrate the end of 2012, we’re bringing you a selection of our favorite oddball stories from the past year. Trust us: this is as strangest as it gets.
That headline pretty much wraps up the mythology in this story. A few men in China had stolen a baby eagle from the nest a few years back — golden eagle is, of course, a cure for hemorrhoids — and later swore another eagle had repeatedly attacked them. The only unanswered question: How does one climb to an eagle’s nest with a case of hemorrhoids?
In an unforgettably unscripted moment, “television viewers in Ontario, Canada were treated to a little gay porn as they sipped their morning coffees.” A local news station showed viewers a few minutes of pornography when its signal was crossed with a cable network. As the original story reads, “consider where morning news programs regularly appear in public. Think gay porn on gym television screens, gay porn at Starbucks.”
In Kenya, a Catholic Diocese reluctantly entered a local debate on the merits of drinking urine. After two local priests encouraged their flocks to peel the sleep from their eyes each morning with a steaming glass of their own urine, Bishop Salesius Mugambi was forced to take a position: “The so-called urine therapy is neither our project, nor did we create it.”
Looking for a job as a stripper? Head over to your local high school job fair. Last summer, the Canadian government rolled out rules that made it difficult for strip clubs to hire foreigners. As a PR stunt aimed at ruffling feathers, an exotic dance advocacy group announced plans to recruit at job fairs in Vancouver high schools. Not surprisingly, it never happened — but it makes for a fun read.
A state-run news agency in Iran found the following headline so enticing, they plagiarized the entire story: “Gallup Poll: Rural White Prefer Ahmadinejad to Obama.” The propaganda machine, always eager to find a story that paints the Iranian president more favorably than the American, did not realize the story came from America’s finest source for news satire, The Onion. Nothing The Onion prints is factual, including the story that was likewise reprinted as truth by state-run media in China: “Kin Jong-Un Named The Onion’s Sexiest Man Alive for 2012.”
Any other explanation necessary? Here’s a bit: After a hunting trip, photos surfaced of Carlos Delgado posing over a dead deer (standard, right?) and a vanity shot with the deer’s testicles balanced atop his skull. Delgado got into trouble “with politicians, animal rights activist and just about everyone else.”
There’s no better way to say this than the way it was already written: “In South Africa, fashion designers say they’ll soon sell a new line of clothes in the United States. The designs feature sleek fits, jaunty accents and vibrant colors that evoke the years the country’s founding father, Nelson Mandela, spent rotting in a jail under the boot of Apartheid authorities.” The label: 46664, Mandela’s identification number at Robben Island prison. Which is more discouraging: that the designers made the clothes in the first place, or that they marketed them in America?